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French Friday - Marriage, Parenting, & Prolonged Adolescence


In a more personal French Friday, David French shares about the mix of pride and sadness he felt when his adult children and his grandchildren recently moved away. This leads to a wider conversation with Skye Jethani about the challenges and blessings of parenting, the pros and cons of getting married young, and why millennials in nearly every developed country are delaying marriage and having fewer kids. They also touch on the recent Republican primary debate, and what Trump’s indictments mean for the 2024 presidential race.



0:00 - Theme Song


0:17 - David and Skye open up about recent life changes


15:39 - Declining birth rates and prolonged adolescence


47:42 - Sponsor - Radvo Register today for the Radvo Conference (Sept 21-23) at https://radvoco.org/


48:52 - Politics, Republicans, and Trump


1:12:39- End Credits


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18 Comments


My 31 year old daughter has no intention of having kids ( she's getting married next year) due to the state of the world (climate change, etc) and fear she'd fail at parenting (I think she'd be amazing)

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Tyler
Tyler
Sep 09, 2023

NPR The Pulse did a happiness episode https://www.npr.org/2023/09/06/1196550020/finding-happiness and they reported on a study about happiness between single, married, and married with children. In most countries, happiness stayed level or increased with children, except the US. In the US, happiness decreased with children, and they found the reason was lack of social supports line affordable child care. Take a listen!

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Tyler
Tyler
Sep 09, 2023
Replying to

https://ifstudies.org/blog/does-having-children-make-people-happier-in-the-long-run


https://www.cnbc.com/2021/03/16/does-having-children-make-you-happier-science-of-parenthood-explained.html


https://www.theatlantic.com/family/archive/2021/11/does-having-kids-make-you-happy/620576/


Maybe we could just ask, "If we believe having children is important, why don't we work on building a society where it's a joy to have children?" Because the US is a statistical outlier in these studies; no other country in the world find children so depressing, and the cause is clearly the lack of social support and financial feasibility of raising children. Because the US is an outlier on those things as well.

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Amanda Benedict
Amanda Benedict
Sep 09, 2023

Echoing what many people write here- Millennials and Gen Z are being impacted by the financial burden of having children. It's less about a personal deprioritization of kids & family, but a social one- with healthcare being tied to jobs, and corporations not being required to pay for maternity/paternity leave, much less proving a living wage... I'm a college educated RN, and have been working for several years now- I do NOT make enough money to support my spouse on my own, much less support my spouse and a child, and we do not live lavish, extravagant lives. We are not constantly going on vacation, or living above our means as suggested... Life has simply gotten exceedingly expensive, while wages…

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Dale Nicholson
Dale Nicholson
Nov 17, 2023
Replying to

100 percent agree! I am also disappointed by the lack of insight and reflection to the greater American experience in this episode. I also see that same lack of insight reflected in the discussions of choice in regard to women's healthcare. Apparently, no one on this pod has read the stories of married women with wanted pregnancies forced to carry fetus/baby to term although they will die upon birth resulting in traumatized mothers are forced to watch this happen. No discussion of these things happening in Texas and elsewhere on the Holy Post. I am a life-long Christian and was raised in Southern Baptist Church, and I am continually startled by what I'm seeing happen in the "name of God…

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jessmonahan37
Sep 06, 2023

I think younger people do value having children. Does one have a child in a country which overwhelmingly dismisses the impacts of climate change and the strain our large population puts on God’s creation? Does one have a child in a country which continuously refuses to make any policy change concerning school shootings? My child just started Kindergarten today, and in my gut I’m hoping to God she will come home safe. Does one have a child in a country where the average highly educated person who was told that a college education would earn them more than minimum wage is currently making $40,000 and if adjusted for inflation that 40k is less than minimum wage. A potential parent m…

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Tyler
Tyler
Sep 05, 2023

The parenting conversation made me laugh so hard. Sorry. It felt like nonsense to the world I'm living in.


Let me situate myself: College educated, older millennial, ordained minister living most of my life in a Northern state (IA, IL, PA, WI - one year in TX). For the sake of my social location - maybe what you're saying is true in the Southern Bible Belt? But it makes no sense to my entire life experience.


[In the following, I'm talking specifically about college educated people, because that's my experience, but that was also the focus group of your conversation]


When you sluffed off all the economic factors [16:30] (and, as one commenter below said, completely ignored the moral factors…


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